Relinquish your attachment to the known, step into the unknown, and you will step into the field of all possibilities. – Deepak Chopra
I often get the question: What is detachment? Detachment is one of the most important steps in consciously creating your positive reality. At the same time, it can be one of the most challenging steps. In the book Your Hidden Light, detachment is step 3 in the four-step process to conscious creation. In this step, you allow the Universe to take over and bring to you what you desire (whether it be the actual thing you desire or the next step, opportunity or guidance towards achieving your desire). From this place of detachment, all good things flow to you and all things are possible.
Once you decide what you want to create in your life (a new job, a new relationship, more income, a productive day, a joyful experience) and you truly believe it is possible for you with a sense of gratitude, it is critical you release any attachment to your desire in order to most easily receive what you are asking for. This does not mean you forget about your desire or become apathetic towards your desire by saying things like “I don’t really care if it actually happens”. Instead, you feel a sense of confidence and KNOWING that you will receive your desire, and you release any negative feelings of “wanting” or “striving” in your body.
Let me clarify. When you really, really want something that you don’t currently have, you create a feeling of stress and unease in your body. You feel an internal feeling of striving. This feeling is a negative feeling. You must remember that any negative emotion or feeling will always block your positive desires, even the subtle feelings of really wanting something. So, instead of really, really wanting something, you need to decide it is yours and KNOW it is coming to you. There is a big difference between the feeling of “wanting” or “striving” and the feeling of “knowing”. When you “know” something is yours, your body feels calm and relaxed. You feel like you already have what you desire because you have a strong faith and trust it will manifest in your life. In addition, from this place, you can more easily follow your intuition and stay focused and directed in your actions.
In reality, sometimes it is very hard to stay in a calm state of knowing, and doubt and fear start to creep in and overwhelm you. This usually happens when what your desire seems to take longer than you want to manifest in your life or you encounter perceived challenges or roadblocks. You begin to focus on the lack of your desire instead of focusing on a positive feeling that supports you. The truth is, this happens to everybody, even the most experienced conscious creators. When this happens to you, when you start to doubt you will receive what you desire and spiral downwards, know that there are many resources and strategies to help you get back into energetic alignment so you can receive. All you need to do is find the ones that works best for you. Here are some strategies that work for me:
5 Strategies to Help You Detach
- Develop a daily meditation practice. Meditation builds your mental muscle to calm your mind and body. It trains you to consciously put yourself in a relaxed state, a receptive state. I recommend having a daily practice. Start with a minimum of 10 minutes and use a guided meditation to help you relax. Search for guided meditations on youtube or google search for the best meditations apps that will work for you.
- Practice gratitude. If you feel like you are getting caught up in the feeling of lacking something, then start to make a mental or physical list of what you are grateful for. Shift your focus from lack to what you have. Make this a daily practice. When you focus on what you are grateful for, you automatically open yourself up to receive more.
- Fake it before you make it. You have probably heard this saying before. In truth, there is a lot of wisdom to it. By faking that you already have your desire, you start to build a feeling that you already have something. Over time, the feeling of having is truly established and you detach from a feeling of wanting something. You need to use your imagination to picture in your mind and feel in your body that you already have what you desire. Adjust your attitudes, words, and actions to be aligned as much as is reasonable with your desires.
- Re-read a favorite self-help book or watch inspirational self-help videos. Inspirational and educational, spiritual self-help books and videos are great resources to help us re-center ourselves and remind us of how powerful we truly are. I list several books on the resource section of my website www.yourhiddenlight.com.
- Shift any feelings of fear or doubt into a productive action. When fear or doubt creeps in, shift your focus to something that serves you and moves you in the direction of your desire or into anything that is positive, productive, and makes you feel good. Don’t let fear and doubt paralyze you. Let these feelings be a signal that you need to shift your attention into something that serves you (write, create, build, read, laugh, explore, etc.).